It was a beautiful Sunday at home, a house warmed and decorated for the holidays. I began to look about the kitchen cabinets in search of some readily available ingredients in order to create the impossible meal that is rich in protein, low in fat, high and fiber and pleasing to our taste “bugs,” as my six year old calls them.
Temporarily ditching my scavenger efforts, I began scrolling through social media. Passing a support fund post, I stopped and scrolled back up. Dreadfully, I discovered it was in fact the person I thought it was initially. How can this be? He and my husband had been establishing a solid friendship and making plans to travel internationally together. My heart sank. I was also struck with the painful reminder that this month marked one year since my cousin and friend’s husband passed away, both unexpectedly and prematurely.
Later, I found myself reading these words—“Enjoy this season and count your blessings because not everyone will make it to the end of this year.”
We all know that the holiday season can be trying, and share the desire to experience a peaceful and joyful holiday season while preventing any negativity. Yet that’s not always possible. So how do we deal with holiday headaches and hardships and make room to feel joy?
Remember, behind every complaint is a disappointed high dream. We dream/hope for something or fear the worst. Here are a few examples of dreaming:
In business
High Dream: I would love to take two weeks of paid time off at the end of this year.
Low Dream: I won’t be able to take additional time off due to year-end goals and agendas.
Unfolding this, I recognize that by delegating tasks and workloads (and possibly even asking for forgiveness ahead of time) that I might be able to take a few days off of work at the end of the year. As a result I will return to work with my batteries charged and my creative juices flowing.
In personal life
High Dream: I would love to take my family to Hawaii and enjoy a Hawaiian holiday
Low Dream: Due to budget constraints I will not be able to take a family trip this year for the holidays.
Again, I can use unfolding techniques to recognize that I might and should be able to plan a trip to visit the islands in the new year. Then, I would have something to look forward to all year long.
So what did I discover? What is possible from here?
Relationships are inherently creative — they produce something, even in relationship with self. Dreaming into possibilities was simple and reassuring and instantly made me feel lighter about myself, my decisions, my actions and my approach to the holidays.
So when you anticipate that conflict might arise with a colleague, co-parent, co-founder or co-coach, or even with yourself, you might find it helpful to get curious about their dreams. High Dream/Low Dream is a solid tool that supports us in making relationships inherently meaningful.
