Worldwork embraces the idea that we are continuously impacting the world, whether we are conscious of it or not. While Worldwork can involve big acts of altruism and community spirit, it always starts with self.
Often, the Worldwork that can be the most challenging can be the impact we have on our immediate, intimate connections: family, partner and friends.
Who do you want to be for the people you love, your colleagues and your community?
Start by naming the different voices that are showing up.
Secret selves
Begin by looking at your own internal voices and own system. One way to do this is through a paper constellation. It’s really simple:
- Get a piece of paper and draw a big circle.
- Write down (or draw) all the different parts of you that are reacting to a given situation. Give each voice a name like: Secretly Pleased Self or Overwhelmed Self. Put them out in front of you in your circle, so that you can start working with them objectively.
- Try to capture all of the voices.
Developing a conscious relationship
We all have voices we may be ashamed of or frightened by: perhaps a cynic, a victim, a bully.
What you don’t deal with doesn’t go away. It just becomes a rotating voice in your head that will unconsciously drive you. However, when you look directly at it and relate to it you become conscious.
When we name these voices, as opposed to burying them, we can start to work with these parts of self more objectively. There’s no escape from knowing yourself. If you don’t process this self consciously, you will inevitably process it unconsciously—through illness, burnout, panic attacks and anger towards the people you love.
We can either bury these different parts of self and wait for these time-bombs to explode, or we can get curious and find out what they need.
Choosing how you want to be
When we are tired or anxious, it’s like pressure building up inside. Like lightening, this build-up of tension is looking for a place to ground. Half the time, it wants to ground out by being mad at a partner or our team. When we are not conscious and intentional about it, we can end up taking out this anxiety on the people around us.
When you find yourself triggered, ask yourself-which part of me is acting out? Which self is wanting to throw all of the toys out of the pram? Once you’ve identified which voice is reacting, you can then start to deal with it directly. What does it need?
When you find that pressure is building, you can be responsible. For instance, if you know you’re going to be bad company, take some time apart to work with your internal systems and to steady. Instead of adding stress to your environment, how can you help to mediate it?
Hippo defense
Hippos are very dangerous, particularly in water. However, when they’re on land, they don’t move fast and they’re quite unwieldy. Here, they have a different defense mechanism: they eat river weed which passes through them very quickly and if they’re under attack they turn their hind towards their attacker and spray poo all over them!
Who in your intimate circle might be receiving the rear end of your hippo defense right now? Which parts of you might end up acting out against your loved ones? Your worried self? Your anxious self? If we can name it and become conscious, we can be at choice.
Working with our internal selves
This is a practice which requires discipline. Whether it’s rolling out your yoga mat every morning or taking a walk at lunch, it’s important- particularly during uncertain times- to regularly check in with your selves to find out what they need. If you think of yourself like a loaded gun, make sure you’re not going off in an uncontrolled way. Otherwise, when pressure builds up you might end up letting it out on the people around us and/or adversely affecting your own health.
What do you need to self-regulate? Space? Exercise? Meditation? Find out what you need in order to be more of the person you want to be.
Your Worldwork
One of the things that makes Organization and Relationship Systems Coaching (ORSC™) special is that we hold all of our students as change agents. You can be an agent of change right now by asking yourself how you want to be today, in every context.
Never forget that your impact, whether conscious or unconscious, sends ripples out into the world around you.
What is one thing you can do today to positively impact the people around you?
What do you need to be the person that they need?
Remember: Worldwork starts with you.
Worldwork is a key part of the ORSC Certification mastery-level course. Learn more about Organization and Relationship Systems Coaching (ORSC™).
Author
Faith Fuller ORSCC, CPCC, ICF-PCC
Faith co-founded CRR Global and co-created Organization and Relationship Systems Coaching (ORSC™). She is a psychologist and experienced trainer and coach, with decades of experience in working with organizations, couples and communities. Faith is also the author of Relationship Matters: A New Paradigm for an Evolutionary Leap in Relationship.
